Every year, our player development system enters what we call “The Forge” during May, June and July. This is the application phase. Players are expected to apply everything they learned during the previous nine months.
Yet, after nearly three decades of coaching athletes, business leaders, pastors, parents, politicians and professionals, I have learned something important:
The biggest challenge is rarely physical.
The biggest challenge is often mental.
Most people do not need more information.
They need better processing.
That is where counseling comes in.
The Difference Between Coaching and Counseling
Coaching Answers: “What should I do?”
- Focuses on performance
- Focuses on skills
- Focuses on execution
- Focuses on outcomes
Counseling Answers: “Why am I doing what I am doing?”
- Focuses on thinking
- Focuses on emotions
- Focuses on beliefs
- Focuses on decision making
Coaching helps people perform.
Counseling helps people process.
The best coaches understand both.
Why Counseling Is Missing in Sports
The youth sports industry spends enormous amounts of time discussing:
- Mechanics
- Velocity
- Recruiting
- Exposure
- Strength training
- Competition
But very little time is spent discussing:
- Fear
- Anxiety
- Identity
- Confidence
- Relationships
- Decision making
- Purpose
Players are often taught how to swing.
Few are taught how to think.
Thinking Is Hard
Thinking is not simply brain activity.
Thinking is intentional.
Thinking requires stopping long enough to evaluate reality.
Thinking requires asking:
- What should I start doing?
- What should I stop doing?
- What relationships should I pursue?
- What relationships should I avoid?
- What habits are helping me?
- What habits are hurting me?
Many people stay stuck because they never stop long enough to think.
Metacognition: The Skill Behind Growth
Metacognition is thinking about thinking.
The most successful people I have counseled are not necessarily the most talented.
They are often the most self aware.
They understand:
- What they believe
- Why they believe it
- How those beliefs affect their behavior
When people learn to think about their thinking, they begin to change their lives.
Why Players Need Counseling
Athletes face challenges that statistics never reveal.
Questions like:
- What if I fail?
- What if I disappoint my parents?
- What if I am not good enough?
- What if I never reach my goals?
- Why am I losing confidence?
- Why am I struggling despite working hard?
These are counseling questions.
Not coaching questions.
Why Parents Need Counseling
Parents often carry pressure that affects their children.
Questions like:
- Am I helping or hurting?
- Am I pushing too hard?
- Am I not pushing enough?
- How do I handle disappointment?
- How do I help my child navigate adversity?
Many parent challenges are not baseball problems.
They are thinking problems.
Why Coaches Need Counseling
Not every coach knows how to counsel.
Many know how to teach mechanics.
Far fewer know how to help players:
- Process failure
- Handle pressure
- Navigate relationships
- Build confidence
- Develop self awareness
Great coaching requires more than instruction.
It requires understanding people.
10 Questions to Determine if Counseling Could Help
- Do you frequently feel overwhelmed?
- Do you struggle to make important decisions?
- Do you repeat the same mistakes despite receiving good advice?
- Do you feel stuck?
- Do negative thoughts affect your confidence?
- Do you struggle to recover from failure?
- Do you compare yourself to others too often?
- Are your relationships creating stress?
- Do you have goals but no clear plan?
- Do you spend more time reacting than thinking?
The more “yes” answers you have, the more valuable counseling may be for you.
My Counseling Philosophy
For nearly three decades, I have helped people think.
I have counseled:
- Major League Baseball players
- Amateur athletes
- Business executives
- Pastors
- Politicians
- Parents
- Staff members
- Young adults
My goal is not to tell people what to think.
My goal is to help them think better.
Because better thinking leads to better decisions.
Better decisions lead to better outcomes.
Final Thought
The future belongs to people who can think clearly.
In sports.
In business.
In ministry.
In marriage.
In parenting.
In life.
Coaching can improve performance.
Counseling can improve the person.
And when the person improves, performance often follows.
If you or someone you know could benefit from counseling, strategic thinking, accountability or personal development support, contact me at: askcj@diamonddirectors.com
Sometimes the breakthrough is not learning something new.
Sometimes the breakthrough is learning to think differently.
Remember: Intelligence tops being smart.
For more information, visit www.diamonddirectors.com today.
If you found this inspiring and thought-provoking, or if you have any questions, comments or concerns, add me on Discord and let’s go deeper.
C.J. Stewart has built a reputation as one of the leading professional hitting instructors in the country. He is a former professional baseball player in the Chicago Cubs organization and has also served as an associate scout for the Cincinnati Reds. As founder and CEO of Diamond Directors Player Development, C.J. has more than 22 years of player development experience and has built an impressive list of clients, including some of the top young prospects in baseball today. If your desire is to change your game for the better, C.J. Stewart has a proven system of development and a track record of success that can work for you.
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